Red Rocket Worth Second Round Pick?

Who wants Jennings or Harvin? traded their 2014 second round pick to Not Relevant! for the Red Rocket and the Not’s 2014 fifteen round pick.

Of course, this was after the Rocket’s five touchdown, 408 point performance against the Jets and right before his zero touchdowns, three picks and a fumble, 123 point turd against the Dolphins on Thursday Night Football. To be fair to the ownership of the Jennis, Dalton have averaged 373 points over three weeks, but to be fair the Commish, the League office informed the Jennis on Wednesday that Dalton was a high risk move. But the Vick injury, followed by the Bradford injury, followed by the Vick injury, really forced the Jenni’s hand.

This was the eight trade of the season and the third between these two teams. The Jenni’s have sent their second, third, fourth, and sixth round picks to the Nots. They’ve all been fair deals, but one could make the argument that there’s collusion going on here. Whatever you call it, these teams will only have each other to thank, or themselves to blame, for their success or failure over the next two seasons.

Welker Traded for 2nd Round Picks

Not Relevant! has traded Wes Welker and their 2014 7th round pick to Who wants Jenni ngs or Harvin? for Julio Jones and their 2014 3rd round pick.

This was a quick move by the Jennis after it was announced today that Julio Jones would miss the rest of the season. The Jennis had previously sent their 6th and 8th round picks to the Nots for Eddie Lacy and Antonio Gates.

Worth noting, these are also the last two League Champions. So maybe they’re mad with power, but hear me out on this… What if Greg wins this year and Hank wins next year? Could we be in a Sampson-Dunfee infini-loop of success!?! I don’t know what kind of apocalypse that would portend, but it will truly be the end of days.

That said, this was a lateral move for the Jennis, because they replaced the #2 wide out in the League with the #3. But it was a huge get for the Nots because they can keep Jones and still trade Dez and/or AJ.

This proves that deals are out there. Now go make them happen.

Lacy & Gates Acquired for Picks

Not Relevant! traded Packers’ running back Eddie Lacy and Chargers’ tight end Antonio Gates to Who wants Jenni ngs or Harvin? for Colts’ Tight End Charles Clay plus the Jennis’ 2014 4th and 6th round picks.

The Jennis also get the Nots’ 2014 16th and 17th round picks.

This is the first trade of the season for either team involving future picks.

Hank Dunfee, Champion

ray lewis celebration

In just his third season, Hank Dunfee is our League Champion. Congrats, Hank!

Hank joined the league in 2010, captaining the questionably-named Denard’s Shoelaces to the playoffs, only to be blown out in the opening round to eventual runner-up, the Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars.

But the Laces really came untied in 2011 and they managed only two wins. But they weren’t just dragging on the bathroom floor–the Laces acquired three–count ’em–three second round picks that season (he literally owned a third of the second round picks in 2012), and nabbed extra 4th and 7th round picks to boot.

Like the Lions, Hank LOVES wide receivers and he used those extra second round picks on Jordy Nelson, Victor Cruz, and Dez Bryant. But it really helps when your last pick is in the 10th round of the draft and it was Hank’s amazing back half that propelled his team last season–Tony Gonzalez, Robert Griffin III and Michael Crabtree were all drafted late.

The newly name Hopefully Relevant! went 7 and 4 in the regular season, but still secured a bye before defeating Jon Gruden’s Bang Bus (Osman) and The Overacheivers (Tom) en route to his first fantasy championship. Hank joins Dave (2006, 2007), Lane (2008), me (2009), Ben (2010), and Greg (2011) in the hall of champions.

Congratulations, Hank. Good luck trying to repeat.