The 2014 BNB Draft will be Monday, September 1 at 7:15pm pacific / 10:15pm eastern.
Please mark your calendars accordingly. See you in the Draft Room!
Figure you’ll never win the Lottery?
Does it seem like half the first round goes to one team?
Does it feel like you’ll never have a shot at drafting your favorite player?
I propose that in 2015 we transition to an Auction Draft.
I doubt I have to explain how it works (but in case I do, click here). And I probably don’t need to explain why it is awesome, so I will suffice it to say that it is simply the most fun way to draft. I think it would be particularly fun in a league like this one, where everyone knows each other’s tendencies so well. I am sure that many of you have participated in auction drafts in other leagues, and I encourage you to share your feelings about it with the rest of the league.
I have spoken with several of you in past seasons about how awesome this would be, but I have never before proposed it because it would un-do the future draft pick trading system that has made this league so unique. But now, ESPN allows us to adjust the auction budgets for each team before the draft, and so, we will still be able to accommodate trading of future draft value. Just instead of trading picks, owners would be able to trade draft dollars in exchange for players (only for the following season).
For example, if the standard auction budget is $200, then I could (theoretically) trade Aaron Rodgers to Weiss for $50. Flash forward to the 2015 draft: Dave would have Aaron Rodgers as his keeper, but only $150 in his auction budget. Meanwhile, I would have $250 in my auction budget with which to make it rain at the draft.
We would still have two unrestricted keepers and the change couldn’t take effect until next season, but I think it would really spice things up. What do you think? We’ll vote on this (and other proposals) later this month, but I would love to hear what people think about this idea. Feel free to email me or the entire League with your thoughts.
I propose we process the waiver wire every day**.
Currently we use an auction-style free agent system and the waiver wire processes for the first time each week on Wednesday morning at 9am pacific. As a result, owners have approximately 36 hours to submit their bids.
The problem with that is there isn’t any opportunity to get a ‘deal’ on a highly coveted free agent because every owner has time to read the week’s ‘Top Add’ articles before submitting their own bid. I think it would be nice to reward owners who follow the games and are ready to submit their bids on Tuesday.
**Tuesday is currently the only day that wavier wire does not process. It technically processes on Monday, but only for players involved in the MNF matchup.
The League currently allows 10 starters, 8 bench players, and 1 injured reserve spot. This means that all 12 teams could, and often do, roster 19 players. Simple math tells us that means that 228 players are locked up at any given time. The result of that was felt by each of us last season–waiver wire scarcity.
Just think about what your bench looked like last season–how much garbage was on there? Now think about that time you ran to the computer to bid on some guy you just heard about, only to find out that he was already rostered. It also allowed people to hoard valuable positions. Scarcity, and to lesser extent, hoarding, is what allowed Winerman to overbid on free agents in early weeks only to (unsuccessfully) attempt to extort a trade from the rest of us shortly thereafter.
The ESPN default for 10 team leagues is to have 7 bench spots with no injured reserve. I think this is a good compromise for us since we are a league of 12. And so…
I propose that we eliminate one bench spot and the injured reserve spot.
This would have no effect on the rest of the roster setup. It is simply a reduction in the size of our bench. It’s a very small change, but it will go a long way to alleviate the roster pressures created by such an active league with enormous benches.
It is difficult to imagine what the pros of such a large bench are because, beyond hoarding, it promotes inactivity among owners because they don’t need to cycle any bench players to accommodate for injuries or bye-weeks, plus there is little reason to do so when you know the cupboard is bare. But, if there are folks who like the big bench, I’d like to hear why. So please email me or the League with your thoughts.
This is a tough one for me to suggest, because these divisions have been in place since the League’s inception in 2006. But there is more to like about them then just tradition. It makes scheduling easier, because with 12 teams and 13 weeks in the regular season, each team must play two other teams twice and since there are three teams in each division, that’s an easy choice. Playing your divisional opponents twice each season also helps promote inter-seasonal rivalries.
But it is also a little confusing because we don’t strictly follow the division results when determining playoff seeds. And frustratingly, it makes it more difficult to directly compare teams on the stats page because ESPN breaks them down by division.
I propose eliminating divisions in favor of a unified 12-team league.
That way, we could easily determine our place in the standings, making crystal clear which teams are in the playoff hunt. We will still have the decide which two opponents each team will face twice in a season. Perhaps we could maintain the matchups from the old divisions to preserve some of the history. Just an idea.
Let me know what you think.
Not Relevant! flipped Dez Bryant to FLACC OFF straight up for Reggie Bush.
No picks were involved in the deal. This is the first trade between these two teams this season and the tenth (and final) trade of the 2013 season.
The Overachievers traded DeMarco Murray, Andre Brown, Rashad Jennings and Carson Palmer to the Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars for their 2014 Fifth Round pick.The Overachievers also traded their 2014 Fifteenth Round pick. This was the first trade between these two teams this season and the ninth trade overall.
Sorry folks, no Power Rankings this week. But to wet your whistle, I’ll give you my upset special of the week (for those keeping track at home, I’m 1 – 1 on these):
Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars over Albino Polar Bears
I just think that, with Arian Foster out, Jimmy Graham banged up (although he was last week, and…), and DeSean Jackson neutralized by the fact that Weiss has Foles, this is a recipe for an upset.
Good luck in Week Nine!
A lot of change to the tiers this week. You had to have five wins to get into the top tier, so sorry to last week’s No. 1, the Owls, whose reign atop the Power Rankings was brief, but peaceful. The Jenni’s are back on top, followed by the Bears and the Boos. But will one of the Big Three lose this week? On with the Rankings!
#1 Who wants Jenni ngs or Harvin? 5 – 1 @ 1512 pts/gm
After just one week, the Jennis are back on top of the Power Rankings. But they didn’t really earn their way back though, as they beat the Nots with the Nots’s players (Welker and Lacy combined for 283 points). The Jennis continued their tradition of stellar quarterbackk-play, as Bradford filled in admirably for an injured Michael Vick and combined with Matt Stafford for 552.5 points. The Jennis got themselves in a who-to-start situation with Antonio Gates/Vernon Davis at tight end and the Seahawks/Bears defenses, but the rest of their bench is an island of misfit toys. Thanks to the Julio Jones for Wes Welker trade, their wide out trio remains top in the league (Welker, Brandon Marshall and Demaryius Thomas), so the Law Firm, DeAngelo Williams, and Zach Stacy might just be good enough to spot start for Matt Forte and Eddie Lacy in a pinch. But if either of those last two guys misses significant time, then the Jennis are toast. Maybe I should never taken them out of the top spot, because they’re a shoe-in to stay here for another week. Next up: the Ole Cooch (2 – 4). My prediction: Jennis win by 500+
#2 Albino Polar Bears 5 – 1 @ 1406 pts/gm
The Bears were no doubt confident going into their matchup against the Elder Cooch, but if they knew they were going to get zero production out of Jimmy Graham, their confidence would no doubt have been shaken. But they solved their quarterback puzzle this week and routed the Cooch in an all-around performance. I wonder, though, if T-Rich and Ryan Mathews are good enough running back compliments to Arian Foster for the Bears to take it all. And they have Andre Johnson too, which makes them a little too dependent on the Texans right now for my liking. If they can off FLACC OFF this weekend, they’ll do a lot to prove they’ve earned this spot. My prediction: White Bears notch their sixth win… or do they?
#3 BOO YAH! 5 – 1 @ 1397 pts/gm
So I predicted the BOOs would finally fall in Week 6 and, once again, I was wrong. But it was really, really close. Matt Ryan was on a bye, it’s true, but they would have started Luck (112 pts) anyway, and Big Ben (225 pts) played admirably. But the started their damn-near optimal lineup and they only bested the Deer by four and half points. I’m just saying, it is improbable that a team who’s best running back is Giovani Bernard (Danny Woodhead?) has five wins at the almost-midway point of the season. And they play the Overachievers this week, so its hard to imagine them losing this week either. My prediction: Oh who the f#ck knows…
Do you smell what Alex Smith is cookin’? Paulson sure does. Like Alex Smith, this is a group with a lot to prove. They are all 3 – 3, two games behind the top tier. If they don’t watch out, their dreams of a first round bye could vanish completely.
#4 Sophisticated Owls 3 – 3 @ 1440 pts/gm
A pretty big drop in the Rankings for the Owls from last week (#1). But the Owls put up one of their lowest point total of the season en route to a loss to the lowly Overachievers. Peyton Manning was just all right by his standards, but the rest of the team really sh!t the money bed. Doug Martin has yet to emerge into the first round pick he was supposed to be, and a week like this proves that the Owls won’t be able to rely on Frank Gore or Freddy Jackson winning them anything in December. I wonder, assuming the Owls don’t improve via trade, can this team win it all without a first round bye? I’m starting to think that maybe Manning might not be enough. Rebound game this week against the Weinermans… My prediction: Owls escape the trap, get back above .500
#5 1-Legged Deer 3 – 3 @ 1142 pts/gm
Nothing went right for the Deer this week. They had several close calls in their lineup and one of them (who knows which) cost him the game. But Knowshon and Marshawn had a combined 614 point (literally, more than half the Deer’s points), so they have no excuse. I have mellowed on the Deer in recent weeks, and ultimately this feels like a team destined for a first round playoff loss. But you never know, they could pull of a big trade that makes me eat my words. They better beat the AllStars this week, or I can’t justify them being in this tier much longer. My prediction: Deer win, stay afloat
#6 Not Irrelevant! 3 – 3 @ 1280 pts/gm
You’d like to say they put up a good fight against the current No. 1, but then again, other than the Cincinnati Bengals (532 pts from Dalton and Green), this team pretty much sucked (just 553 for the rest of the starters). The bench was no help to them – they had four squadooshes, and the doesn’t count bye weeks. Honestly, I can’t believe they are still .500. Well done…? If things break their way, they could be alone in fourth place this time next week. Insanity! But they gotta get past the Somethings first. My prediction: Nots continue their spiral downward
The third tier is full of teams with twice as many losses as wins. One, maybe two, will make the play-offs, but it’s tough to imagine three of them making it. It’s time to put-up or shut-up for the bottom-half of the League. Now or never. [insert cliche here]
#7 FLACC OFF 2 – 4 @ 1314 pts/gm
The OFFs had a must win game against the Somethings. And they won. And they did it behind the $140M arm of Joe Flacco (269 pts). If that keeps up, then the OFFs might have a chance going forward, but the loss of Randall Cobb is going to hurt. Badly. Hopefully Brandon LaFell can take his place for a while. And am I a genius for picking up Brandon Jacobs last Thursday, or what? Now if only I’d started him. You can expect to see more than one recent waiver wire pick the OFFs’ starting line-up, which is probably why they’re seventh in the rankings. But it’ll be a tough game against the White Bears this week. My prediction: I really, really want to pick me… so you know what, I will! OFFs get their third win of the season **upset special**
#8 Suckmy Weinermans 2 – 4 @ 1193 pts/gm
The receiving core for the Weinermans is nothing short of laughable: Jerome Simpson, Terrance Williams and Donnie Avery. Yet somehow, they have their second win in as many weeks. It’s conceivable that we could see an entirely different group of receivers start for the Weinermans this week because Marlon Brown, Robert Woods, Austin Pettis and the newly-acquired Jarrett Boykin (who might now be the best receiver on the team) are all on the bench. And they’ve got Mario Manningham, Michael Crabtree and Terrelle Owens rehabbing on the bench. Okay, that last one was a joke, but the rest of that is all for real. This is why we don’t have roster limits, folks, because it’s awesome to see someone collect nine – nine! – sh!tty wide receivers on their team. You can’t make this stuff up. Can their Cinderella run last one more week? They’ve got the Owls next, so no, probably not. My prediction: Weinermans run out of… gas… lose their fifth game
#9 Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars 2 – 4 @ 1245 pts/gm
Does it hurt more to lose to the Weinermans or to lose to the Winerman? Think about the difference. Tough call. And if the AllStars had shook that Magic 8-Ball of quarterbacks one more time and started Nick Foles and Ryan Fitzpatrick instead of Eli Manning and Chad Henne… or Foles and Matt Schaub… or Foles and E.J. Manuel, you would have won! Then again, when your bench scores 913 points and you lose by just 9 points, you could have done just about anything else and won. At this rate, pretty soon we’ll talk about how Weiss used to be good at fantasy football like we talk about how the Browns used to be a proud NFL franchise. Interesting matchup this week against the Deer. My prediction: Foles starts, AllStars lose anyway
#10 The Overacheivers 2 – 4 @ 1082 pts/gm
Do you like Phil Collins? Well you should, because you won… Against All Odds! Get it? You see what I did there? I would love to rank you higher as a reward for your second win, but just look at that pitiful scoring average. I just… I just can’t. I didn’t put you in the bottom tier this week though, as my gift to Overachievers fans everywhere. And, if Cam Newton has another great second half to the season, and RGIII gets his act together, this team will win some more games. But with DeMarco (Polo!) Murray out, it probably won’t be this week. At least not against the BOOs. My prediction: Another loss for the Overachievers
Don’t look so worried, Thad. I’m sure you can hold off Matt Flynn. You may good enough to start for the Bills, but will be good enough to start for the Somethings this week? Only time will tell. Over/under five wins for the Somethings plus the Cooch this season? I smell a poll question!
#11 Ndamukong Somethings 2 – 4 @ 1102 pts/gm
For the first time all season, the Somethings have two quarterbacks! I present to you: Mike Glennon and Thad Lewis! Unfortunately for Somethings fans though, ownership screwed the pooch again and left Thad on the bench. Even with the disappearing act from MegaTron, the Somethings would have won their matchup against the OFFs if they had started their optimal lineup. Could I have underestimated the Somethings…? If they manage to beat the Nots, I’ll consider that possibility. For now, be happy you’re not in the basement. My prediction: Somethings win in a nail-biter, but only if they start V-Jax and Thad
#12 Yester Cooch 2 – 4 @ 1163 pts/gm
It was a tough matchup for the Cooch, but they absolutely laid down for the Bears. Let’s re-cap… They started the Pats defense against the Saints, they started Mike Wallace on a bye, they started an injured Owen Daniels and, perhaps most egregiously, they left Adrian Peterson on their bench. Terrible. Just terrible. They play the Jennis this week. My prediction: Take a wild guess…
Not Relevant! traded Packers’ running back Eddie Lacy and Chargers’ tight end Antonio Gates to Who wants Jenni ngs or Harvin? for Colts’ Tight End Charles Clay plus the Jennis’ 2014 4th and 6th round picks.
The Jennis also get the Nots’ 2014 16th and 17th round picks.
This is the first trade of the season for either team involving future picks.
The Overachievers signaled that they were giving up on the 2013 season today, sending Arian Foster to the Albino Polar Bears in exchange for the White Bears’ 2014 1st and 5th round picks.
The Overachievers also trade their 2014 16th and 17th round picks. The Overachievers had previously sent their 11th round pick to the Weinermans for Eddie Royal and his 2014 16th round pick.
The first edition of the Power Rankings make their debut with Week Four looming. And perhaps rightly so, as we are just now beginning to see the power structure of the League take form. On with the Rankings…!
#1 Who Wants Jenn ings or Harvin? 3 – 0 @ 167 pts/gm
Not Greg, apparently, since neither Jenn ings nor Harvin have been on his roster this season. And while he now has the stupidest team name in the League, our 2011 Champion also has the League’s most dominant team. Led by the dynamic quarterbacking duo of Matt Stafford and the incomparable Michael Vick, the Who…? have vanquished FLACC OFF, The Overachievers and Hopefully Relevant on their way to a perfect record with an astonishing 167 points per game. Of course, Stafford and Vick combine for 57.5 points per game themselves. Oh, and their second highest scoring quarterback is actually on their bench (Sam Bradford), so they’ve got that going for them too, which must be nice. Also nice are the trio of wide outs they can field every week: Brandon Marshall, Julio Jones and Demaryius Thomas. Following the Hank Dunfee model of success, the Who…? is totally reliant on those receivers, because their running backs are the impenetrable Matt Forte, the law firm of BenJarvus Green-Ellis and… DeAngelo “I Had Fantasy Relevance 5 Years Ago, I Swear” Williams… yikes. They probably won’t lose this week either though, because they face FLACC OFF on Aaron Rodgers’s bye week. But their next four opponents after that have a combined record of 8 – 4, so we’ll see how long that undefeated streak lasts…
#2 Sophisticated Owls 1 – 2 @ 147 pts/gm
The number two scoring team in the League (although still 20 points behind the Who…?) has the horse-like, 4x MVP, Peyton Manning, who is averaging 42 points per game and is very sophisticated. The Owls deserve all the points that Manning reigns down this season, having kept Manning the last few seasons through trades and backiotomies alike. But that’s not all the Owls have going for them. They also have the rejuvenated Phillip Rivers, the steady Jason Witten and the thus-far under performing Doug Martin, Frank Gore and Larry Fitzgerald. That’s right, imagine what will happen when the Owls can really spread their wings! Joqiue Bell could be the steal of the draft and they also have Fred Jackson on their bench (are you paying attention here, Weiss?). So how do they have a losing record, you ask? Well, because Who wants Jenn ings or Harvin? put up 191 on them in Week One and FLACC OFF hung another 173 on them in Week Two! But I expect this team’s record to be turned around by mid-season, and if they can pull off a blue chip trade, they should be one of the favorites to go the distance with Peyton at the helm. I think they can safely drop Nate Burleson at this point though.
#3 BOO YAH! 3 – 0 @ 146 pts/gm
How is this team undefeated? I ask you. Don’t get me wrong, they have pieces all over the place: Jordan Cameron turns out to be a beast, Jordy Nelson looks to be in peak form this year and Matt Ryan and Andrew Luck are about as good as it gets at quarterback (but see, Greg’s team). But after that, what am I looking at? Lamar Miller? Giovani Bernard? T.Y. Hilton? That may be a fantasy all star team in 2015, but right now it looks more like list of the week’s top waiver wire pick-ups. But the Boos have never scored below a buck thirty and, while they haven’t played great competition (Yester Cooch, Albino Polar Bears and 1-Legged Deer), their games haven’t really been closely contested. Still, I don’t think this team (as currently configured) is going to be a top seed at the end of the regular season. But for right now, they round out the top tier.
#4 Albino Polar Bears 2 – 1 137 pts/gm
Fantasy teams, like real teams, need identities to win. And the Black Bears are, to mix metaphors, work-horses. They’re not gonna sniff 200 points this season, but they will string together wins. Russell Wilson and Terrelle Pryor are a surprisingly good pair of quarterbacks (averaging over 40 points per game). And they have Jay Cutler! Okay, that one’s a joke. But the Albinos also have a really good tandem on wide outs in DeSean Jackson and Brian Hartline, and you simply cannot overstate the value of Jimmy Graham. If the Albinos hadn’t lost to BOO YAH! in Week Two, they would be in top tier despite their lower point total; but wins against the Suckmy Weinermans and Ndamukong Something are nothing to write home about (see Tier 4). With the right acquisitions, I could see the 2010 League Champion taking a run at another title this year.
#5 FLACC OFF 1 – 2 @ 137 pts/gm
I have been accused on more than one occasion of ranking myself too high. But with Aaron Rodgers and his 33 points per game, I always have a chance, and Alfred “The Butler” Morris and Reggie Bush are turning out to be solid running back pair. But my only win came against the Owls in a monster Week Two performance, and after losing to the Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars and Yester Cooch, I traded for Bilal Powell to add running back depth. I do feel pretty comfortable with Randall Cobb, Pierre Garcon and Steve Johnson as my wide outs though. If ToGo steps it up, this is a team you do not want to face come play-off time.
#6 Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars 1 – 2 @ 126 pts/gm
The Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars are trying to rebuild the dynasty and their desperation showed as they took Suckmy Weinermans main trade-bait and sent their 2014 first round pick off for C.J. Spiller. A Spiller-Rice tandem sounded killer in August, but how ’bout now? There is still plenty of time for them to bounce back though, and CJ2k is no slouch for a RB3. The AllStars have also been active on the waiver wire, snagging early waiver darling Julius Thomas and recently adding Willis McGahee, Ryan Broyles and the Chiefs defense. And I’m sure we haven’t seen their last trade of the season. Percy Harvin ain’t walkin’ through that door any time soon, so they’ll need more help if they are going to regain a winning record (their only win is against me and they lost to the Owls and Hopefully Relevant!).
#7 Hopefully Relevant! 2 – 1 @ 129 pts/gm
I’m sure a tear was shed in the Dunfee household when the Jaguars downgraded Denard Robinson from “Offensive Weapon” to just “Wide Receiver.” I am also surprised not to see the form namesake of the Hopefuls on this roster, because every other wide receiver is – they have A.J. Green, Dez Bryant, Wes Welker, DeAndre Hopkins, Antonio Gates and Martellus Bennett. But their only loss is the Who…?, having defeated the AllStars and the Overachievers, so what do I know? Well, I know that if you think it’s hard for our defending champion to choose among the Red Rocket, Ryan Tannehill, and Jake Locker at quarterback, imagine how tough the choice is when you have Darren Sproles, Eddie Lacy, Da’Rel Scott, Bryce Brown and Bobby Rainey (who the f#ck is Bobby Rainey?) at running back!!! #GOODLUCKWITHTHAT
#8 Yester Cooch 1 – 2 @ 126 pts/gm
Yes, they have AP and Brees. That has been true since time immemorial. But the rest of their team? Yikes. Steven Ridley has been a total bust, Roddy White has been hampered by injury, Victor Cruz plays for the Giants, and the rest of his team is just ho-hum (Mike Wallace, Eric Decker, James Jones). Perhaps if this team packaged some of their middle players together for an upgrade at one position and then was willing to give up picks to acquire a top player at another position, they might have a chance. But this point, this team looks to be fish food for the eventual championship contenders.
#9 1-Legged Deer 2 – 1 @ 114 pts/gm
The now confusingly named 1-Legged Deer have a winning record and can be legit contenders if with a few savvy moves. Paulson probably didn’t expect Alex Smith to be THAT much better than Tom Brady, but the two have turned out to be a serviceable pair. Knowshon Moreno was a big pick-up on draft day, and Marshawn Lynch is looking to be everything he was expected to be. And, while nothing to write home about, Marques Colston and Reggie Wayne are two wide outs with big upside each week. If Maurice Jones-Drew comes around, this team could be a play-off contender and has the bones of a championship team if they can acquire a piece or two. But they’ll have to do something because they are lowest scoring team in the League.
#10 The Overachievers 1 – 2 @ 115.5 pts/gm
Admittedly, the numbers aren’t their for the Overachievers. For right now, at least, the name does not fit the team. But on paper, I still like this team: Arian Foster and RGIII are both under-performing but are still fully cable of becoming dominant again. Even Cam Newton hasn’t fully reached his potential yet. But Demarco Murray is running strong and when Gronk comes back (which looks like it will be next week), the Overachievers can run with anyone in the ‘Lig.’ Plus, the ownership remains as strong as ever, nabbing Eddie Royal, Kenbrell Thompkins, James Starks and Brandon Hoyer off the waiver wire. Watch for this team to creep up the rankings from here… They’ve already played the Who…? and, well, um, the Weinermans and the Hopefuls, so they’ve got a lot to look forward to.
#11 Suckmy Weinermans 0 – 3 @ 119 pts/gm
After selling his soul last season in a desperate attempt to win it all, the Suckmy Weinermans have flipped the script and are already a seller this year, sending C.J. Spiller to the AllStars for a 2014 first rounder pick. And while some say they were a little quick to pull the plug on this season, their record says otherwise (they lost to the Albinos, the Somethings and the Overachievers in consecutive weeks). And when you reach on a guy like Colin Kaepernick and whiff, well, then it’s time to face facts. They also have Tony Romo, and LeSean McCoy is certainly the team’s shining star, but those are the only guys they are unwilling to trade! The rest of the roster is absolute garbage, with more than half their starters having an ESPN ownership percentage less than 35 percent! So how is this NOT the worst team in the League? Well, let’s ponder that for a moment…
#12 Ndamukong Something 1 – 2 @ 116 pts/gm
To hear the ownership of Ndamukong Something tell it, he was in the draft room, surrounding by handmade rankings and piles of research, he got up to take a whizz, and BAM! All the quarterbacks were gone! And, in a sense, we all felt that way. But the rest of us found a way to draft someone other than Christian Ponder… I mean Christian-f#ck!ng-Ponder! And here we are, already in Week 4, and who’s the starter in Minnesota? You guessed it, anyone but Ponder. Go ahead, keep telling yourself that it’s his ribs, and not the fact that Wario (a/k/a Ziggy Wilf) didn’t finally wake up and realize, “holy-f#ck!ng-sh!t, Christian Ponder is my quarterback!” Do you think he still has Tavaris Jackson’s phone number? Okay, to be far to the Somethings, their keepers are looking waaay better now (Megatron was always a beast, but Jamaal Charles has also returned to form). But after Vincent Jackson and Darren McFadden, this team falls off a cliff. Read that last sentence again. One more time. Yep, this team is in big trouble. Their only win has come against the Weinermans in Week 2 (they’ve lost to the Albinos and the Deer). And unless they solve the quarterback situation, its hard to image the Somethings as anything but sellers come the trade deadline.
I am in four fantasy football leagues and after three weeks of football, I feel I have enough data to make the following observation… This is the tightest, most aggressive waiver wire I have ever seen.
But what has turned us all into waiver wire hawks? Maybe its the fact that the Bad News Barristers have always remained 12 teams strong. Or maybe its our huge 8-player benches. Or it could be the addition of the Offensive Player position.
Or maybe it was Hank bidding $90 on Da’Rel Scott, who I think is this guy…
But Hank isn’t the only one who has made some questionable decisions. Kennedy paid $40 for James Starks only to watch him go down the next game. But Kennedy wasn’t going to be fooled twice though, letting Greg take Jonathan Franklin, the Packers third stringer, for a cool $11.
And what the f#ck has Winerman been doing? Other than emailing us weekly trying to trade us everyone but Geno Smith? He’s been paying $24 for Eddie Royal, $15 for Jason Snelling, $10 for Andre Ellington, $8 for Robert Turbin, and $5 for Donnie Avery, plus a revolving door of garbage for $1 – $3. Perhaps the fervor will die down once Winerman has exhausted his auction budget (he has only $14 left).
But we are all victim of the waiver wire madness. After the T-Rich trade, Willis McGahee went to Weiss for $21. And I paid $11 for Chad Henne, who I have since dropped. That decision was motivated by the fact that there are absolutely ZERO starting quarterbacks on the waiver wire. Indeed, quarterback scarcity has definitely played a role in the close attention being paid to the waiver wire. After all, when I went to the wire to replace Henne, I was shocked to learn that I wasn’t going to get the jump on Brian Hoyer, because Kennedy already had him. Even more amazing. It was announced this morning that Josh Freeman was being benched and that Buccaneers would start rookie quarterback Mike Glennon. Osman picked up Glennon on September 13th! So, I was left to pick up this guy…
For those who don’t immediately recognize him, that’s Matt Cassell. Yes, formerly of the Patriots and Chiefs, but he now plays for the Vikings. He’s not the starter yet, but he will be soon. And when that happens, Mike Glennon will be Osman’s only starting quarterback on his roster. Anyone else smell a trade? But that’s what it takes in this league, apparently. And I, for one, think its awesome.
The only problem with it that I have is that we have too long to weigh our decisions. Perhaps we wouldn’t have to waste so much money out bidding ourselves if the waiver wire processed on Tuesdays as well. The down side of this is of course that we will only have about six hours to get our first waiver wire bids in each week (from approximately midnight to 9am pacific). The upside is that we might be able to get a deal once in a while because it doesn’t give everyone a chance to read Chris Harrison’s free agent suggestions on Tuesday afternoon. If other people like the idea of a Tuesday waiver wire, we will put it to the League for a formal vote.
Kudos to you all for making this the most competitive season of Bad News Barristers fantasy football yet. Keep up the good work and good luck in Week Four!
Winerman traded Jets running back Bilal Powell and the Vikings defense to Dimond for his 2014 5th and 9th round picks.
Winerman also trades his 2014 15th and 14th round picks.
Winerman traded Eddie Royal and his second to last pick in the 2014 draft for Kennedy’s 2014 9th Round Pick.
As I was putting together the League Annals page, I began to consider the League through a longer lens. And I wondered: Which among us is the best owner in League history? After trying long and hard to find a way to conclude it was me, I was lead to a different conclusion by counting down from seven to one…
The Bad News Barristers came together seven years ago. But since then, we have crowned just six league champions: Weiss (‘06, ‘07), Nussbaum (‘08), Cutchshaw (‘09), me (’10), Sampson (’11), and Dunfee (‘12). Of course, the original five teams in the league (Abbasi, Dimond, Sampson, Weiss, and Winerman) have a significant advantage in a contest that rewards sustained success (so sorry Emilio, you didn’t have much chance of winning this one). But even among the first five, Weiss’s post-season dominance is unparalleled: Weiss has played for the title four times in the League’s first seven seasons!
Weiss’s detractors will point out that his first championship came against a depleted talent pool; after all, the League had such fabled members as Ben “Who Wants My Best Player?” Pong Wang, Drew “My Girlfriend Goes to Another Middle School, I Swear” Bradylyons, and Maurice “Like Thick Molasses” Worsley. And those detractors will point out that his second title was won with a .500 record. Maybe the detractors have a point…
Okay, so if not Weiss, then who? Well, if we forget about rings and focus on W’s, there are only three teams have won 50+ games in League history: Kennedy (52), Weiss (51), and me (54). But remember, Weiss and I were original members, so our averages aren’t very impressive. To be second all-time in wins in only six seasons, Kennedy sports a whopping .675 winning percentage! And he’s never had a losing season! Weiss, meanwhile, has managed just three winning seasons in seven years. It’s Montana-Marino. Brady-Manning. Weiss-Kennedy. How can we settle such eternal questions? Well, here’s what did it for me…
The Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars are one of only two teams who have never changed their name (see also, Suckmy Weinermans). I mean, my God, the Caminker Hair Mousse AllStars have outlasted the Dean himself! How it can ever be changed now? It’s practically in memoriam.
In all seriousness though, we all know that it came down to this: Weiss is the only one who has won it all more than once. And while the five one-time winners will try to match Weiss this year as the six never-have’s vie for their first taste of sweet victory, we should all take a moment to consider how truly rare back-to-back fantasy championships really are. Even if they were half a decade ago.
Good luck at defending your Championship, Hank, and putting your own name in this conversation.
Justin has won the Lottery with the winning number 97 and Suckmy Winermans will have the number one overall pick in the 2013 Bad News Barristers Draft. Congratulations! With the lowest odds of winning (just 3%), Justin has pulled off the unthinkable. Although it must suck to be Greg right now, this is truly what the Lottery is all about.
The second pick will be decided at the close of the Dow today, so check the Journal’s homepage at about about 1:30 pacific to see who will pick second! Good luck to everyone left!
Although it’s unlikely, if one of Winerman’s numbers comes again (97 – 99), the winning number will simply be the second- and third-to-last digits of the DJIA (i.e., the two digits on either side of the decimal), and so on as necessary.
The third pick will be decided tomorrow. After that, picks four through 12 will be determined by reverse order of last year’s standings in accordance with League rules.